We did a breath workshop tonight with Yee-Ching. She is this tiny, delicate little Asian woman who has traveled all around the world teaching her "Breath of Change" workshop. When Greg tried to describe it to some girl who missed it he called it "unlanguageable." This is exactly what it was. It was one of those experiences that you had to be there and really feel to experience. This blog really does nothing in the way of reconciling words with experience.
So far, all of the guest speakers who have come to share theirknowledge with us have been so different, but they've all had this quality of goodness, something about them that made you want to listen and be in their presence. Yee-Ching was the tiniest litte thing, but she ahd such a commanding presence. She had direction and she made us feel safe and comfortable in a situation that was definitely uncomfortable for alot of people.
Closing our eyes was a vital part of this breath workshop. With out eyes closed, we created a safe place, a palce that was all our own, where we had to sense to see. We went through fast breathing then slow breathing and medium breathing and Yee-Ching would guide us through each level of breathing in a sublt yet commanding manner. It was beautiful to listen to myself breath and to listen to the people around me breath to. It was beautiful being in the midst of my own internal experience and also in the midst of so many other internal experiences.
At the end of all the emotionally charged breathing we had to lie down in savasana. Yee-Ching and Greg came around and coverd us all in a blanket. I noticed that feeling warm makes me feel less lonely. This is what happens when we breath full yand deeply; we get relly really warm. So savasana was the fun part. It felt like I went through an entire life-cycle during the course of the experience; there were highs and lows and I cried, laughed, got frusterated, get sad, nostalgic. It was like an emotional rollercoaster, but it went by in a flash. This breathing exercise mirrored life and all its emototional ups and downs. It ws extremely beautiful to experience it for myself and with so many of the other beautiful people in this program.
I never really got that Marianne Williamson quote until today. I mean, i understood it, but we can understand and know alot without really ever experience what we know. Marrianne Williamson wrote:
“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”
Tonight, all the crying, the laughter, the silly noises, the weird sounds, and the loud breathing were all so liberating. The idea that we could all experience the same thing, yet have so so so many differennt emotional reactions to it was so powerful. It was a fearless night. And an important one. Because yoga and especially translating it must be a fearless endeavor.
In love,
Leila
